How To Bring Dating To The Next Level
You can disagree without fighting. A functional relationship doesn't mean you always agree. How boring would it be if you felt the exact same way about every subject? If you can discuss your differences without blowing up, then the relationship has a shot at going the distance. You're planning future activities for the two of you. I'm not talking about planning to get your favorite over70dating login cart tacos the next time you have a craving.
I'm talking about activities, day trips, hometown visits — anything that's an upgrade how to protect your heart when dating the typical date. Thinking about the future means you're ready for something more. You told them something only your closest friends know. Becoming an official couple begins with this phrase: It could be something as serious as a deep dark secret, or something as frivolous as your recurring dream about living in a house made of cheese.
You've dropped their name at work. When you start talking about the person to your coworkers, you're thinking about something more than just a casual fling. Having them meet your parents doesn't seem far-fetched. You're finding their quirks cute. Suddenly, you're finding this person's quirks totally adorable. Like how she hogs the covers in her sleep, or how he always sneezes after his first sip of coffee.
There's no need to hesitate. You don't have to rehearse a big speech that addresses all of her potential objections. Just go ahead and say what you want. Yeah, I know you're scared of being needy. This is pretty common these days: The idea is that nobody wants to be high-maintenance, so you might as well go the other way, and be as low-maintenance as possible. Just be totally chill — to the point of zombie-like catatonia — and you'll achieve relationship bliss. This is total nonsense.
Mostly, expectations aren't what screws up relationships — it's the opposite. How to bring dating to the next level having expectations is a terrible idea. Being emotionally attached to someone but not knowing what you're going to get out of them is like carrying your heart through a minefield. Because, I hate to break it to you, but sometimes you, like, need people.
You need to be taken care of sometimes, in whatever way — sexually, emotionally, or even physically, if you get wicked bad food poisoning. And when you're in that situation, if you're in a no-rules, super-chill, easygoing relationship, you won't know if your partner will be there. That's a terrible burden. Even non-monogamous relationships need rules. You might admit this intellectually, but you're concerned about something else: My response to this is simple.
So what if you freak her out a bit? That's actually not a huge problem. Monogamous relationships are scary, complex, intense things. You're saying, "there's an outside chance we might grow old and die together. And you'll have to just ignore all those other people in your life you want to bone, indefinitely. Being a little intimidated by that is human. That just means you respect the depth of your obligations. Do NOT present this as an ultimatum or with a crowbar behind your back, coercing him into what you want.
Stay neutral and treat him just like you would a friend. He may not give you an answer right away — especially if marriage is your goal. Kim Sarrasin is known as the Queen of Hearts and has one mission in life: To heal the hearts of women worldwide and end your suffering with how to bring dating to the next level.
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How To Take Your Relationship To The Next Level
Moving A Relationship Forward
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